#Blogbattle : A Problem

***Just a quick note: I haven’t posted as usual or been around on social media for the past few days as I haven’t been well. I’m keeping my fingers crossed that I’m getting better now, so all things should return to normal. There are some new things that I want to try out on the blog as well, so if everything goes to plan, a shake-up is in the processes. 🙂

This week’s #blogbattle word prompt is chasm. This is run by Rachael Ritchey over on her blog Writing Rachael Ritchey. I encourage you to check out her blog, and this challenge.


1.1000 words max

2.fictional tale (or true if you really want)

3.PG (no more than PG-13) Content – let’s keep this family friendly!

4.Your story must contain the word(s) from the theme and/or be centered around the theme in a way that shows it is clearly related

5.Go for the entertainment value!

6.State the Genre of your story at the top of your post.

7.Post your story on Tuesday, by 11:59 PM PST

8.Use the hashtag #BlogBattle when tweeting your story, put a link back to your #BlogBattle Short Story in the comments section of this page, and/or include a link to this page in your own blog post (it creates a “ping-back” which will alert me and our friends to your #BlogBattle post)

9.Have fun!

My genre: Fantasy

Here’s my entry for this week:

A Problem

Indian started to speak, her eyes focused on her hands in her lap. “I was afraid, and angry, and I have a gift. I don’t call it cursing though.” She looked up at those words, and faced the Queen. “It’s more about imposing restrictions on things, giving them rules and conditions to live by.”

The Queen raised her eyebrows, not looking convinced at Indian’s alternative viewpoint. “That doesn’t exactly answer my question as to why you cursed my Clan?”

Indian’s shoulders sagged even further. Winter didn’t think she could look any smaller. “I honestly believed that you were responsible for poisoning the river. I got angry, and did it before I knew I’d done it. I’m sorry. If what Winter says is true, and I think it is, then I really am sorry for blaming you and cursing you.”

“Can it be undone?”

“The only way is to fix the river.”

The Queen looked like she was considering for a moment. “And who are you exactly? Why are you alone?”

Indian’s shoulders squared this time, bravely lifting her head to fully face the Queen. “I come from the Web Clan. I had to leave because of my Gift.”

Winter’s heart squeezed inside her chest. She heard what Indian didn’t say – that she was thrown out, made to leave like Winter herself had been. She read the same understanding on Queen Farah’s face, though she doubted she would have the same empathy. “You aren’t alone now, okay?” Winter said, and reached for Indian’s hand.

Indian initially flinched away, but then let Winter hold her fingers. Their eyes met and Winter saw timid hope there. She smiled, hoping it would reassure her.

“So,” the Queen said, bringing the conversation back, “you have a plan to fix the River Winter?”

“I do. I need all four of us with Gifts, including Tango. I think together we can stop the pollution and then that will lift the curse.”

“And you will expect that Indian will not be punished for what she has done?” the Queen asked.

Winter looked at Indian. She was young, and alone, and felt betrayed and angry. But she had to understand that she had done wrong. “I think she feels bad enough,” she said.

The Queen didn’t look like she agreed.

“Why don’t we leave that debate while after we get the River fixed?” Birch said, intervening from beside Winter.

“I think that’s a good idea,” Flame agreed.

“I think that should be our priority,” Winter said, and looked at the Queen, hoping she would agree.

Farah drew a sharp breath, then nodded. “Very well. We shall fix the River, then decide on what should be done about individual wrongdoings.”

Winter smiled in relief. Indian’s head was lowered, her eyes fixed firmly on her lap again. “It will be all right,” Winter said to her quietly.

Indian gave a tiny movement of her head.

Winter took it for a nod. Then said to the Queen, “We need Tango.”

“I’ll have someone bring her in.” She turned to one of her attendants, whispered something, and he left the room.

While they were waiting, Winter ran through her plan in her mind. It should work. She envisioned every part, chewing on her bottom lip until Birch laid a hand on her shoulder and said, “What are you thinking about?”

She looked across at him, and said, “The plan. Making sure it will work.”

“I’m sure it will. And if it doesn’t, then we’ll work it out as we go.” He smiled, and it warmed her heart.

She smiled back.

The doors opened and the attendant from before led Tango into the room. She looked as terrified as Indian had when she’d first entered.

“Please sit,” the Queen said, indicating the seat beside Indian.

Tango sat down, glancing at Winter as she did. “What’s happening?”

“Winter has a plan to fix the River, and she needs your help,” Farah said, then indicated to Winter to explain.

“I think by the four of us working together we can fix the River, and that in turn will lift the curse on your Clan,” Winter said, then realised she hadn’t introduced Indian to Tango.

“Oh, and this is Indian. She’s the fairy who lives across the River.”

Indian raised her head and looked at Tango through loose strands of black hair that fell over her eyes. “The fairy who cursed you. Sorry.”

Tango looked at her wide-eyed, then at Winter, then back to Indian. “Oh,” was all she managed to say.

Flame cleared his throat. “Sorry to be the one who bursts the berry here, but I’ve just thought of a problem with your plan.”

Winter’s heart started to sink. “What?”

“The curse stops the River Clan from leaving this Tree?”

“Yes,” Farah confirmed.

“And does your plan involve Tango going outside?”

“Yes,” Winter said, her heart really sinking now.

“Then how is she going to do that without drying the river up?”

“Oh.” She hadn’t thought of that. Suddenly it was like a chasm had opened up before her.

These water fairies were sustained by the River’s magic. Without it…


28 thoughts on “#Blogbattle : A Problem

  1. “Sorry to be the one who bursts the berry here…” Nice touch!
    It’s really amazing how you can make such small pieces so immensely interesting, Phoenix! And I love the fact that there’s os much dialogue in it. Mine always lack good dialogue. I think I’ll start writing more of it to get better.
    And I love the name “Indian.” And a thought has just occurred to me. If you ever need Indian names to play with for your pieces or other writing, just let me know. I can easily help you out (that is if you need it.)
    Have a great day, dear!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you. 🙂 I sometimes think i get too much dialogue and not enough description – it’s hard to get the balance right. Practice makes perfect though. 🙂
      I’ll keep your offer in mind, thank you. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

    1. I am feeling better, thank you.
      Winter does have many problems to face. As did I in coming up with an answer, which I’m not sure will live up to expectations. Time will tell. 🙂


  2. The tension is built. What shall they do if Tango can’t leave without drying up the river? I love the questions you’ve stirred here. 🙂 I hope you’re feeling well and recovered! Also, what is this talk of stirring things up? 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. It’s amazing how easy it is to point out the flaws in your own stories, but how hard it is to then solve them. I’m afraid it might be a bit of a let down. Oh well. 🙂
      Yes, I’m feeling better. Thank you.
      Well, I’m thinking the blog needs a makeover, and I’ve got some ideas for for some features. It’s just a matter of putting things together. Fingers are crossed it goes well. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      1. True. I have no doubt you’ll solve whatever the flaw needs solving! 🙂

        Glad you’re feeling better, too. That’s exciting! Sometimes I love makeovers to blog and other times I’m like, where’d all the stuff I’m used to go? haha

        Liked by 1 person

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